Tackling Sibling Rivalry - KMSP-TV

FOX Medical Team

Tackling Sibling Rivalry

Posted: Updated:
ATLANTA -

Are you all grown up and still competing with your siblings? You’re not alone!

Sibling rivalries go all the way back to Cain and Abel, and we all know how that ended.

But – even if you’ve been feuding for years, it is possible to make peace.

Sibling rivalries can start young, and fester for a lifetime. Psychologist Wendy Dickinson of Grow Counseling says many of us start competing for our parents' attention before we are even aware of what we're doing. Dickinson explains, “Because it happens as early as a year old, so it's likely that the siblings don't even have any recollection of how it developed, or when they first kind of felt pitted against each other."

Dickinson believes competition between brothers and sisters is a natural part of growing up and it isn't necessarily a bad thing.

She says, “I think in some ways, sibling rivalry can be helpful, because you kind of push each other to be the best version of yourself that you can be. So maybe the rivalry pushed you in athletics, or it pushes you in academics in some way."

The problem? It’s easy to get stuck in roles - like Mom's favorite, or the smart one, or the successful child And if siblings don’t address the slights and hurt feelings, childhood rivalries can spill over into adulthood, pitting grownup children against each other.

Dickinson says, "I think it becomes problematic where it crossed into an area where someone's sense of value is hinged on how much attention they get, and whether they win the competition. That's when it really starts to become an issue for someone."

Dickinson believes it's possible for even the most fierce family rivals to make peace and move on. But you have to want to fix the problem. And you may have to make the first move. As siblings, you can't change the past, but you can choose to let it go, to stop trying to one-up each other. Dickinson says hear your sibling out, and try not to be defensive. And validate the other person’s feelings, even if you remember things different. Remember, she says, you’re all on the same team.

  • Good Day ArchiveMore>>

  • Back to School Jamboree with Hosea Feed The Hungry

    Back to School Jamboree with Hosea Feed The Hungry

    Hosea Feed the Hungry will host their annual Back to School Jamboree on Sunday, July 13, 2014 from 10:00 a.m. until 3:00 p.m. at Turner Field. Children will receive a backpack filled with school supplies.

    Hosea Feed the Hungry will host their annual Back to School Jamboree on Sunday, July 13, 2014 from 10:00 a.m. until 3:00 p.m. at Turner Field. Children will receive a backpack filled with school supplies.

  • 'National Dance Day' takes stage nationwide

    'National Dance Day' takes stage nationwide

    Thursday, July 24 2014 9:33 AM EDT2014-07-24 13:33:07 GMT
    Nigel Lythgoe Co-Creator, Executive Producer and Judge of the hit FOX TV show “So You Think You Can Dance (SYTYCD)” which reignited America’s passion for dance and has become a pop culture phenomenon, announces that the 5th annual National Dance Day will take place on Saturday, July 26.
    Nigel Lythgoe Co-Creator, Executive Producer and Judge of the hit FOX TV show “So You Think You Can Dance (SYTYCD)” which reignited America’s passion for dance and has become a pop culture phenomenon, announces that the 5th annual National Dance Day will take place on Saturday, July 26.
  • Former "X Factor" Favorite Opens Studio, Trains Future Superstars

    Former "X Factor" Favorite Opens Studio, Trains Future Superstars

    Thursday, July 24 2014 9:05 AM EDT2014-07-24 13:05:59 GMT
    Any fan of FOX's "The X Factor" will remember Tara Simon, a Top 24 finalist on Season 2. She didn't go all the way on the show, but her career
     Any fan of FOX's "The X Factor" will remember Tara Simon, a Top 24 finalist on Season 2. She didn't go all the way on the show, but her career as a singer -- and singing coach -- couldn't be going better.
  • More Health NewsMore>>

  • Sandy Springs woman struggles with Alzheimer's diagnosis at 55

    Sandy Springs woman struggles with Alzheimer's diagnosis at 55

    Thursday, July 24 2014 8:42 AM EDT2014-07-24 12:42:55 GMT
    The Alzheimer’s Association estimates about 200,000 Americans are living with early-onset Alzheimer’s disease, diagnosed before their 65th birthday.
    The Alzheimer’s Association estimates about 200,000 Americans are living with early-onset Alzheimer’s disease, diagnosed before their 65th birthday.
  • FOX Medical Team

    Easy 'fat burning' recipes

    Easy 'fat burning' recipes

    Thursday, July 24 2014 7:40 AM EDT2014-07-24 11:40:05 GMT
    Here are the recipes from Nancy Waldeck of the Cancer Wellness Center of Piedmont Hospital.
    Here are the recipes from Nancy Waldeck of the Cancer Wellness Center of Piedmont Hospital.
  • FOX Medical Team

    5 fat-burning foods you should try

    5 fat-burning foods you should try

    Wednesday, July 23 2014 12:19 PM EDT2014-07-23 16:19:49 GMT
    Tired of working out with no payoff, or counting calories and still not losing weight? Healthy chef Nancy Waldeck at the Family Wellness Center at Piedmont Atlanta Hospital pulled together five fat-burning foods you need to discover!
    Tired of working out with no payoff, or counting calories and still not losing weight? Healthy chef Nancy Waldeck at the Family Wellness Center at Piedmont Atlanta Hospital pulled together five fat-burning foods you need to discover!
Powered by WorldNow

KMSP-TV
11358 Viking Drive
Eden Prairie, MN 55344

Phone: (952) 944-9999
Fax: (952) 942-0455

Didn't find what you were looking for?
All content © Copyright 2000 - 2014 Fox Television Stations, Inc. and Worldnow. All Rights Reserved.
Privacy Policy | Terms of Service | Ad Choices