by Adrienne Laursen
You’ve heard it before… in order to be happy in a relationship you first need to be happy with yourself. Sounds great, but how do you get happier? Adrienne Laursen, LMFT, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Fox 9 Relationship Expert, shares tips for making yourself a happier person, right now!
1. Make a conscious effort
There’s no magic wand for this stuff. You have to really, really want to make changes if you want your life to be different. Of course, just wanting to change isn’t enough, but the first step is making a conscious effort to go for it!
2. Exercise more often
Go for a walk outside and soak up some sunshine to boost your metabolism and increase your endorphins (natural happy makers). Try introducing regular exercise into your daily routine, even if it’s something small, just to get your energy level up. Did you know that exercise is a proven effective strategy for overcoming depression?
If this feels overwhelming, start small. Go for a short walk, do some sit-ups in front of the television, engage in a leisurely bike ride. Just getting your body moving is a good start!
3. Spend time with people who make you feel good about yourself
Really make a concerted effort to spend quality time with people who make you feel good about being you. Having close bonds with other people is an important component of feeling happy and loved as a human being.
You may also want to take this time to re-evaluate the relationships that do not leave you feeling happy, and maybe it’s time to “spring clean” your personal life. You deserve to be with people who leave you feeling supported, appreciated and loved!
4. Re-evaluate the expectations you have for yourself
Everyone has their “shoulds”… I should have started my diet last week, I shouldn’t have eaten that donut, I should be making more money, I should be married by now… (and the list goes on and on). Try looking at what you ARE, rather than what you SHOULD be. Make a list of the things you like and/or appreciate about yourself.
Give some thought to whether or not the expectations you’ve set for yourself in regards to health, career, love life, family demands, etc. are realistic. It’s really hard to be happy if you’re constantly overwhelmed and feeling like you’ve fallen short of your expectations.
5. Get your to-do list done
If it’s been on your list for more than a month, either do and get it over with, or remove it and forget about it! Maybe you have something difficult you need to get done for work, or need to buy something that you don’t really want to spend the money on. Finishing things you’ve been procrastinating on should give you a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. Then moving forward, don’t make so many lists and/or try not to procrastinate!
For more information on Adrienne’s counseling services and free relationship tips, please visit her website at www.TheEngagementCoach.com.