Are you an introvert or an extrovert? What about your partner? A relationship containing one of each can have its challenges, along with being very frustrating and confusing. Adrienne Laursen, LMFT, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and owner of The Engagement Coach, breaks down the confusion surrounding these personality traits, and offers couples a clearer understanding of the introvert/extrovert relationship balance.
The difference between Introversion and Extroversion is often mistakenly understood as being shy or outgoing. But there's a lot more to it than that! Carl Jung describes the difference in terms of energy… where do you get your energy, and where do you lose your energy? Let's break down the two for better clarification:
Common myths about introverts
- Don't like other people
- Don't like to have fun
- Introverts are shy and not good at conversation
- Socially awkward or anxious
Characteristics of an introvert
- Introverts are more focused on their inner world (Extroverts - the outside world)
- Feel drained and lose energy from interaction (taking away their energy)
- Gain energy from quiet, intentional alone time
- Still interested in interaction, but usually prefer one-on-one vs. large groups (may enjoy the large group from the sidelines)
- They do like people, but usually prefer quality over quantity
- Prefer meaningful conversations over senseless chit-chat
- Can be great leaders and public speakers, their intentionality and preparedness lend to their success
Common myths about extroverts
- Always up for having fun, life of the party
- More confident, social and outgoing
- Extroverts don't like quiet or alone time
- Always loud and talking
Characteristics of an extrovert
- Extroverts more naturally gravitate toward the outside world (Introverts – their inner world)
- Gain energy from interaction with stimulating people
- Feel drained and lose energy from spending too much time alone, but that doesn't mean they don't ever like to be alone.
- Extroverts do typically like to be around people, but the right people. If they're around the wrong people that aren't stimulating, they too will feel drained rather than energized.
Can you be a mix?
YES, absolutely! Think of it in terms of a spectrum, with each personality type at either end.
Take a quiz here: http://tinyurl.com/IntrovertExtrovertTest
For more information on Adrienne's counseling services and free relationship tips, please visit her website at http://www.TheEngagementCoach.com