Why women (and sometimes men) lose themselves in a relationship - KMSP-TV

Why women (and sometimes men) lose themselves in a relationship

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MINNEAPOLIS (KMSP) -

Relationships are hard… and sometimes, it's easy to get lost among all of the roles and responsibilities a good relationship requires. Here's why women (and sometimes men) lose themselves in their relationship.

Role Identity

For a lot of women, being in a committed relationship gets confusing in terms of "What role am I supposed to fulfill now?"  When you're single, it's just you and you get to fulfill yourself in many ways (career, friends, social life, spiritual, health, etc.) and when you're in a committed relationship, you're now faced with balancing your own life with someone else's life and expectations.

Misinterpreted Expectations

Women often feel they are supposed to act a certain way… believing it's what their partner wants.  In fact, what typically happens is that the person your partner fell in love with goes away.  It's likely your partner's expectations haven't changed, but rather your expectations for the person you "should" be have.

The Fantasy of a Good Relationship

Because most women still believe that a happy relationship is the most important thing that will happen to them, they need to make sure they don't do anything to ruin it.  Even in 2012, traditional roles in a relationship still apply, whether apparent to couples or not.  Women still feel the burden of carrying their relationship, being a good cook, sexual partner, emotional partner, mother, wife, etc.  There is SO much pressure to get married and have children… it's just what you're supposed to do in life.  And when you're not able to achieve those societal goals, there must be something wrong with you.  (just ask your mother, she'll likely tell you all about it!)

It's Easier To Focus On Others

It can often be a convenient excuse to not have to work at your own life anymore.  While you may have been successful in the past, it might seem to be a daunting task to keep all of those balls in the air now.  It might be easier to manage the house and focus on your husband's career, than to look at yourself and what you're missing in your own life.

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